Life Lessons

 

The only thing I ever truly wanted in my life was to be a wife and mother. I never really wanted to be a career woman but here I am with a career. My mom and dad taught me the importance of doing a job well. I do enjoy my job but the last three years I have given more of myself to the job than what is healthy. I am burned out, my marriage, children, and relationships have suffered because of my job. I have missed important times with my kids, husband, and family. I had a, real, non-working vacation this summer for the first time in three years. After this vacation I realized several things and I am going to share them with you.   

1. Take time to notice the little things. Appreciate the hugs and kisses, the dishes done, the meals cooked, the unexpected phone calls. All too soon so many of us find that those kindnesses are gone; whether the person has passed on or is simply no longer in our lives. Notice the good things done for you.
2. Do things without expecting anything in return. If you give your spouse a foot rub, don't expect a returned favor. If you cook a meal or stop and get medicine for someone, don't expect to get anything in return. The truth is, if you spend your time expecting something in return, you forget what it means to give with a glad heart and you turn into a cold, hard person. "Generosity with strings is not generosity: it is a deal." ~Marya Mannes
3. Time is a precious commodity. If you ask most people that have lost a loved one for any reason, most people will say the one thing they wished they had was more time with them. Time to show how much they loved someone. Time to see a smile or hear a laugh. Time for another intimate moment with a person. Time is something we take for granted. Everyone assumes they have an abundance of time when truthfully, you never know how much time anyone has. My dad always told me growing up, make sure you tell someone how much they mean to you every time you get the chance because you never know when it will be your last time.
4. Love your children. They are only little for a brief time. Teach them to be kind and respectful. Teach them to look out for others, especially those who cannot look out for themselves.
5. Love your spouse. One of the greatest gifts you can give to your children is to love your spouse. Teach your children what a healthy relationship means. Teach them that healthy relationships are built on unconditional love and mutual respect.
6. Exercise and eat well. This one goes a long way towards helping your children too. Teach your children healthy habits because they will grow up to be a lot like you someday. This summer I started exercising regularly with my oldest son. It has benefited both of us and we get to spend time together regularly.
7. Have faith. I am a Christian; I am not a very good Christian but I am a Christian. I am not a good witness because I feel everyone should choose the right thing for them but for me, I believe and have faith in God. I know even in my darkest moments when I feel lost and forgotten, I am not alone. God is always there for me and has a plan for me; even when I have to walk through difficult times and feel alone and afraid, God is there. "For I know the plans I have for you," declares the Lord, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." ~Jeremiah 29:11.
8. Stress less. Stress can kill you. This one, quite frankly, is one I am not sure how to fix. I am so stressed all the time that I have become angry and bitter. But exercising regularly seems to help. Find what works for you and then keep doing it.
9. Communicate more. One should never have to apologize for being open and communicating their feelings. I am not saying that you should just say whatever is on your mind and be cruel or hateful but communicate with those around you. Tell people what is going on with you. If you need help, ask for it. Never punish or balk at anyone for opening their heart to you because if you do they may never confide in you again. How terrible would it be for your child to stop communicating with you because you made them feel terrible about opening up to you. There are conversations that are better had in a safe and loving environment than shared with someone who does not have a person's best interest at heart.
10. Surround yourself with people that truly care about you. Listen, we have all been there. We want to hang out with the popular people. We want people to notice us and sometimes that means making the wrong decision; a decision that could hurt us or someone else. Sometimes it is just being with someone who is so negative that we take on those characteristics but other times it is more than that. Do you have people around you that encourage you in a positive way or are you surrounded by selfish people that do not care what is best for you an the others in your life? I find that when I am in a bad spot, it is so easy to spend too much time being negative and hateful about others and finding people that will do the same. When I feel better, I surround myself with those people that I love and who love me in return. I make healthier decisions and am usually happier.

So as I approach this last few months of 2013, I have a simple goal. Live my life and follow the lessons above. Do kinds things for myself and others without feeling guilty or expecting anything in return. If at all possible, repair relationships that have suffered from giving too much to my job. Love freely. Learn to let go of the things that have hurt me and learn to stress less. Love more.

I hope my thoughts will help inspire you to come up with your own life lessons. To realize what you need to do differently in your life. Whatever you do, LIVE YOUR LIFE.

To see another blog that inspires me to LIV, please go here: http://www.huberthoneys.blogspot.com/